Self Reliance - A Fact.

Copyright © Mark R Kelly 2026.

Time has trickled by and I've been reluctant to post, primarily because I 've had very little to say, plus so very little of note has caught my attention, or happening within my life.

One aspect has changed for me - the sad realisation that you can't rely on other people, and that will sometimes extend to those closest to you.

Case in point was a friend I've known for over a decade through our mutual interest in online gaming, met via a game called 'Smite'. Oddly enough, it was through a different friend that I was introduced to this guy (who I'll call James - not real name); the two had teamed up in some earlier matches and hit it off, so my buddy brought this new player into our inner circle. He and I clicked and have known each other (and gamed together) ever since.

That was up until roughly eight weeks ago, when suddenly, and without explanation, James stopped responding to my WhatsApp messages, not answering Discord messages, and generally not gaming.

 After ten-plus years of problem-free friendship I found this both odd and very concerning.

Eventually, after sending a last message saying, "Ok then, it was fun while it lasted. See you around." did I get a reply.

Apparently there were some personal issues going on, so I told him not to worry, get life sorted out and give me a shout when ready. Three weeks have passed and nothing.

But to be blanked so easily at the outset? I, personally, would have said, "Won't be online for a while, got personal stuff to sort out. Will reach out when done." The fact he wouldn't even reply to repeated messages asking if everything was ok, if he was ok, eventually leading up to my asking if I'd upset him somehow - that was what pissed me off so much. 

It was at that point I realised I couldn't, and shouldn't rely on people, or hold them in the regard I had been doing. It just fucks you up mentally. You question yourself, your words, actions and behaviour. It's irresponsible, quite frankly.

I've noticed a trend with some folks I know, who only seem to reach out when it suits them. It's mad to think that before mobile phones, email and texting, folks actually made more of an effort to communicate. And now, with it being at the tip of their finger tips, people just can't be arsed.

Madness.

I feel we, as a species, have allowed technology to dumb us down mentally, emotionally and socially. Many would disagree, stating their 'social media' has XX number of "followers/friends", but that's all bullshit. Social media has created a platform for disingenuous projections of half-truths and lies and pretence in regards to what people do, act and live. It's a fantasy land and a dopamine pump, nothing more.

As a result, the reliability of people without our 'inner circles' are not to be relied upon 100% - I'd even go as far as to say 50%, if at all.

I will confess, these outcomes have turned me into a more distant individual in terms of communicating with those I feel are unreliable or just about themselves - you know, the closet narcissists and sociopaths that creep into your life somehow.

But I will, to those I feel deserve my trust, will try to be as good a friend as possible. Once upon a time I would dive in whole-heartedly. I've learned since, the hard way, that it was rarely reciprocated. So therefore I now choose my commitments to people very carefully.

It's a shame to say this, but I mourn for the past, detest the present, and hold no hope for the future.

But that's just me, hopefully, your world and life view is a totally different (and more positive) perspective.

I'll leave you with Duran Duran - "Ordinary World".